If My Dream was to Live in a Irish Country Cottage...

...I would be watching the housing market like a hawk right now! Property prices are tumbling and bargains are to be found throughout Southern Ireland. For many folks, the idea of living in the beauty of the rolling Irish hills has been simply a dream, with falling house prices, that dream may soon be more attainable.

As we rode through Southern Ireland, we were amazed by the number of new houses, the number of houses in a 'paused' state of construction and the number of old (cottage-y) houses standing empty (just begging to be restored). We kept asking ourselves, 'Where did all the new houses come from, why are these old houses standing empty, and what has happened here?' Like many other countries around the world, Ireland has been hit by the recent economic crisis and their boom preceeding the crisis was in housing, and they built like the market was booming!

The result? The market tanked and now many of those properties are sitting empty. EU immigration is down, unemployment is up and housing prices are falling. UCD economist Morgan Kelly predicts that housing prices could fall as much as 80% from the peak in 2007. There are bargains to be had.

However, because of all of the above, you'll probably need to bring your own job. And that doesn't mean bringing your own job by buying a property and opening a B&B, there are tons of those already so I personally wouldn't put my income eggs in that particular basket. To take advantage of these bargains, bring your own job means generating an income which comes from an external to Ireland source. This is doable for those whose income is derived from rental, investment or Internet income, or for those who have the city job during the week and spend their weekends in the country.

And I wouldn't count on property values going up in a big way for a while, this is for someone whose dream has been to live in Ireland and until now that dream has been unaffordable - not for someone who is expecting to make big property gains.

But if you do dream of that little Irish cottage by the sea, friends and neighbors with that lilting accent and those rolling green hills, watch the prices - you may just find what you're looking for, at a price you can afford.

Living Abroad

Many dream of pulling up stakes and living abroad. Spain, France, Italy - ah, that Mediterranean lifestyle. Warm sunny days, evenings spent on the terrace with a cool glass of wine and a view of the mountains or the sea. The excitement of learning a new language, the challenges of experiencing a new culture. Taking a tumble-down old place and turning it into the home of your dreams.

There are some wonderful stories to inspire your thoughts in this area. Stories which talk both about the challenges of living abroad and the wonders of it. Stories which tell about the day-to-day living and make you say, 'Oh, THAT'S what I want to do!'

My three current favourites are A Year in Provence, Under the Tuscan Sun: At Home in Italy, and A Good Year . All three are warm, funny stories about people who have picked up sticks and moved to Italy and France. They have each also been made into movies, A Good Year , A Year in Provence, and Under the Tuscan Sun .

Is it really like those movies if you take the plunge and start a life in a new country? Nothing is exactly like the movies, but some things will be similar, some can be more challenging and some can be better! I moved to England to start a new life and met my husband - sounds just like a movie, doesn't it?!

Anyhow, something for a rainy day and a little dreaming!

A Lot of People Think This Costs a Lot of Money

"I wish I could afford to do that" is what we often hear when someone finds out we've quit serious work and gone sailing. People often put off their dreams because they think they cannot afford them, but actually the cost of 'living' (out one's dreams) versus the cost of being a 'productive member of society' (with all its associated trappings) can be quite low.

Personally, I find it really difficult to avoid spending money when I'm in 'regular life'. When I'm at home, with the car and subject to all of the obvious and subliminal 'buy this, buy it, buy it RIGHT NOW' messages, the temptations are enormous. Actually, I'm amazed that there isn't more of a debt problem for people. When I'm off in my own 'personal paradise', it's very different.

When I'm off living out my dreams, I actually have to work to (or seriously think about) spending money. Lunch out? It's not a 'convenience' drive through and inhalation of some horrible food on the road, it's a special event, a treat. Most of the things I want to do are right in, on or around the sailboat and I don't need to purchase entertainment. Since I started doing the things that make me happy, I greatly reduced the money I spent on a never-ending quest to buy happiness.

The cost of 'living' versus 'living regular life' is quite low. You need food and shelter, some entertainment. There is the cost of health care (which is admittedly lower in the UK than in the US), but what would the cost of health care be if you had time to focus on preventing illness rather than curing it after it takes hold? What if you had a lifestyle that allowed time for eating well, keeping fit and keeping stress levels virtually non-existent? Costs of 'living' are much less.
(I've used sailing as an example for this discussion, but substitute almost any other dream lifestyle for sailing and the points still hold true.)

A lot of people think going sailing is really expensive and it can be very expensive, but it doesn't have to be. You certainly can spend a fortune on a boat, staying in marinas, and eating out frequently at restaurants. (And actually many people do this in regular life, live in an expensive house, stay at hotels, and eat out all the time – sound familiar?). You can also spend very little if you choose.

Anchoring your boat in a beautiful Bahamian harbour is absolutely free. Having a freshly caught fish for dinner in your cockpit with a view better than almost any restaurant? The cost of a bottle of white wine to go with it. Spending your days exploring, snorkelling, walking on the islands, free.

Your expenses? Once you're past the initial acquisition costs for the boat, expenses are food, fuel, repairs (they can be big or small depending upon your skills), entertainment, health care and communications. Some people spend $100 a week, some people spend thousands a month – it depends upon your skills and your choices.

Initial acquisition costs for a boat (or an RV or place in the country, whatever your dream is) don't have to be high if you have the skills to take something and fix it up. We've met people out here in new sailboats the same size as ours costing $200,000, ours cost less than a third of that and is of better quality (new stuff isn't always best). If you were a young couple, you might not need a 41-foot, two bedroom, two bath sailboat. You might be like the couple we saw tanned and trim in their 20's on a 30-footer. It is smaller, but it's cheaper to acquire (probably a third of what we paid or less for a fixer upper, particularly in this market), cheaper to run and maintain. Also, they're out living their dreams now.

Something that makes things so expensive is that we don't have the ability to do things ourselves anymore. Here's a really simple example. How many people learn to cook really, really well? If you cannot cook well, you turn to restaurants for a nice meal, and there are some wonderful restaurant meals out there. But what if you cooked as well as the restaurants? It took us about a year of focused effort, but we now cook as well or better than the majority of restaurants out there. An expensive meal that used to cost us over $100 (or £100) now costs us less than $15 – with wine. If we go out now, it is for the experience (and a nice meal) rather than just to be able to have a nice meal. For the $100 we used to spend, we now have 10 nice meals.

If we buy another car (notice I said if, not when), it will be an older one that Steve can fix himself rather than a new one that has so many electronics that it must be serviced by someone else. So many things are more expensive when you pay someone else to do them.

People think living out your dreams costs a lot of money. I would argue that not living out your dreams costs more. Because you're working (and you don't have the skills), you pay someone else to fix things, to prepare things and you then 'treat' yourself for all the time you spend working (to pay for the things you don't have the skills to do). We're just as guilty of this as anyone, when I think of the money we've dished out to do things we could have done ourselves I cringe.

It depends upon your skills and your choices, but it doesn't have to cost a lot to live out your dreams!

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The Value of Now

Came across a couple of wonderful examples of living one's dreams.  They make me think about the value of doing things now versus waiting.  Check out these two photos of boats in the same bay in the Bahamas.  The small boat has a couple on it and their dog.  The big boat has a crew plus a couple and some friends.

 

The thing that I think is interesting here is the small boat can be bought for very little money (or bought and fixed up for even less) and then, poof!, you're off living out your dreams - now (in your 20's, 30's, 40's).  The big boat (unless Daddy left you that trust fund) will take many years to earn pushing you well into late 50's or 60's before you head out to enjoy your dreams.

 

Now the little boat is a lot smaller and it doesn't come with a crew.  However, it is very funky and cute - and, most importantly, very comfortable.  It's got a great deck on the back, perfect for diving from, dining alfresco and just watching the world go by.  That size also comes in a price range that many people can afford with some work, savings, and a little effort.  You can have the little boat now.

 

The big boat, well, it has everything - big screen this and electronic that, plush everywhere and lots of space.  It also has the associated big price tag.  You can have all that, but you have to work for the next 20 years to get it.  Are those things worth 20 years of your life?

 

The financial advisors and writers we read suggest that you need big chunks of cash in order to retire, big chunks of cash that will take until you're at least 65 to earn.  I think that's a myth designed to keep the consumerist economy chugging along.  You are conditioned to have more, more, more rather than to realise when you have enough (remember, Steve's Concept of Enoughness - what is enough for you?  Never mind what everyone else thinks is enough for you!).  There are plenty of people (besides us) who aren't waiting, who are having their ideal lifestyle now.  All too often we put things off because we want the 'big one', the big house, the big boat, the jet-set lifestyle, but have a think about it, is it you that really wants that or have you simply been told that you want it / must have it so many times that you believe you do?

 

And don't forget, along with waiting 20 years, there's also the issue of health and physical capability.  There is a difference between what you feel like at 46 as compared to what you feel like at 66.  All those advisors neglect to mention that if you put your dreams on hold for 20 years you might not be (physically) able to pursue them - heck, you might not even be here!  (As you may have noted, I do not find the idea of putting things off until later appealing, this is a big reason why!)  How many people do you know who have reached the age of 65 or 68 and find that they (or their partner) are no longer capable of doing those things they've dreamt about and saved for for so long?

 

Is it worth the wait just so you can have the bigger _______ (fill in the blank) or would a smaller _______ suffice if you could do go now?  Would a smaller _______ work if you could have it for 20 extra years?  (Hmm, let me think, would I want 20 extra years cruising the Bahamas or a bigger boat?  The word DUH comes to mind!)  It's certainly worth considering, don't you think?

 

So what's the value of living your dreams 20 years early? 

Dream Vampires

As you think about and start to put together your plans for your ideal lifestyle, you start to get really excited about them.  The whole business is very exciting!  You get so excited that you want to share those plans with the folks you know and the folks you love.  Let me give you a tip here, DON'T!  Do-not-do-this!  If you want to have the wind taken out of your sails faster than you can say big dream, share your vaguely formulated dream with someone you know and listen as they 'helpfully' tear your dream to shreds, 'kindly' providing you with all of their insights into how your dream cannot possibly work.

 

Actually many of the people you know and love won't do that (at least not intentionally), but a few will and as they are tearing your dream to shreds, your motivation melts away at the same time.  There may be no malice in them at all and they may truely believe they are being helpful, but some people just don't 'get' dreams.They are so down to earth and practical, dreaming doesn't make sense to them.  Either way, intentional or not, they suck the life out of your dreams and leave you holding a hollow shell.  I call them Dream Vampires, avoid them like the plague!

 

Share your dream very carefully because when it is in its infancy (especially if this is your first foray into living your dreams) it is very delicate.  It is not fully formed, the whys and whyfores are not completely thought out, all the t's have not been crossed and the i's dotted, you don't know how it's all going to work - you're just at the beginning, for goodness sake!  And if at this stage you are grilled, 'But what about this?' 'Have you thought about that?' 'How's this going to work?' and 'Oooohhh, I don't think that's a very good idea', you might lose confidence and run right back to your safe little house, TV, mall, or cubicle.  Dream Vampires suck away your confidence, your energy and enthusiasm.  That is NOT what you need at this stage of the game!

 

Plan and discuss your dream and your plan with your partner, if you're a pair.  If you're a singleton, is there someone who always supports your ideas and who just thinks you're wonderful?  That's the person to bounce your new thoughts and visions off of.  And during Dream Infancy, your dream is your own special secret, not ready to be shared with a wider audience yet.

 

Stay away from the Dream Vampires until you're fully protected, until your dreams move out of infancy, when you have a complete (and perhaps cast in stone) plan for how you're going to move to your ideal lifestyle and maybe you've even already done many of the steps in the plan.  If you're already on your way, it's easy to just ignore the Dream Vampires!

Why Do People Give Up Before They Start?

"Oh, I'd love to do that, but we'll never be able to."

We hear this one on a regular basis and it's a really interesting statement. My normal response used to be, "Of course you can, all you need to do is this and this and this..." Then the person who said they'd love to do that would look at me and respond with all the reasons that it couldn't possibly be done. Now I used to go on to try and work through those reasons with the person, but I've come to realise that there will be a neverending litany of 'why it cannot be done' responses to all of my 'how it could be done' suggestions. That person has given up before he or she ever got started.

Think of that, before even starting to dream, starting to make that big list of all the great things you want to do in this lifetime, you shut it all down and don't even consider it. Is it fear that prevents people from even thinking about a dream before immediately deciding they cannot do it?

It certainly is interesting to hear all the reasons that folks come up with for not being able to live out their dreams, work, family, finances, friends, pets, plants, etc., etc. - all of which are surmountable should someone really want to figure it out. Just a few options - work can be virtual (and many other things which we'll discuss in future posts), family can come along, friends can visit or you can keep in touch via the Internet (video with Skype, perhaps), pets can travel too, perhaps some gardening can be exchanged for something you do well. Those are just a few options, there are dozens of other ways that people have found a way around those 'reasons' for staying put.

The most interesting thing is what is going through your mind while reading the above, are you thinking of all the reasons why you cannot do what you're dreaming of or or are you thinking of all the ways you can?

What Would You Do if You Weren't Afraid?

Fear is probably the biggest reason that we put off living out our dreams. Fear of change, fear of the unknown, fear of failure. What if I quit my job to live out my dreams and I run out of money? What if I don't like it? What will the wife, the husband, the family and friends say? Everyone else is heading in this direction, how could I do something so different?

Fear slows us down, fear stops us, fear keeps us on hold. Are you in a job, relationship or place in life that isn't making you happy, that isn't living out your dreams? What is keeping you there? Oftentimes it's plain old fear.

The way I tackle fear - baby steps! What does that mean? Making little, tiny steps that individually are very easy and cumulatively add up to a force which enables me to overcome my fear. In this case, I ask myself the simple question, "If I wasn't afraid, what would I do?" It's not making any changes or doing anything, except starting to put together a picture of what I would do if I wasn't afraid.

And it's amazing the ideas and dreams that come to light when you set aside the fear (just to explore what you would do without it, of course!). Passions that you've put on hold because the day-to-day has gotten in the way, childhood dreams that still have meaning, things that you've put off 'until you have time'. Once the fear is put to one side, the blinders come off and a picture of life filled with interesting things emerges.

These are just a few of the things we've done once we stopped being afraid.



What would you do, if you weren't afraid?

"That's My Dream!"

Steve and I were having lunch at the Green Parrot in Nassau today. The restaurant tables are on a patio overlooking Nassau Harbor, the Atlantis Resort on Paradise Island and dozens of sailboats anchored directly in front of us. We had a great view of the boat traffic throughout the harbor and in particular the traffic of the 'cruisers' (those who live aboard the sailboats) as their dingys travelled from the boats and deposited them at the Green Parrot for a Sunday afternoon drink or meal. As we were settling in to our burgers and fries, a woman rushed by us to lean on the wall overlooking the harbor and peer at the sailboats. "That's my dream," she sighed to her friend, "To live out there, on a sailboat, doesn't that look wonderful?"

Four years ago, that was us. We were at the Castaways Restaurant in Clearwater, Florida, on the patio watching the sunset. Silouetted by the sunset in front of us were some sailboats anchored in the harbor and we watched as people travelled by dingy from their boats to the restaurant and back again. As we watched the sun set, we agreed that living aboard a sailboat was the lifestyle we wanted. Two years later we anchored our sailboat in Clearwater Harbor and rode our dingy to have dinner at the Castaway. We sat on the patio and watched our boat silouetted by the setting sun. And now we're in the Bahamas.

Once you are clear about what you want to do, you'll be amazed at how quickly you can make your dreams come true.

Taking Control of Your Life and Doing What You Want to Do

If the path you're on is the path of the Triple C (cradle, cubicle, coffin) and that's not what you want out of life, it's probably time to take control and start doing what you want to do. Take control, you say, what do you mean?

Taking control and getting what you want. Getting what YOU want, hmmm, that sounds a bit selfish. Taking control, sounds a bit agressive, perhaps a bit off the beaten path. Don't see many other people taking control of their lives. Is that really what I should be doing? Well, if you don't, who will?

Think about it, what motivation does anyone have to give you what you want out of life? Does your boss want to see you living out your dreams? Nope, he wants you right at your desk, making a profit and making him look good. Government, not really, there's that whole make lots of money and pay lots of taxes thing. Shops, advertisers, media - definitely not - big focus there on keeping you as a productive consumer. Your family, in some instances yes, in some instances no. So if you're not going after what you want, nobody else really has any motivation to get you there either. If you don't do it, nobody else is going to ensure that you get to do what you want to do in this lifetime.

So, are you in control or are you simply floating along in whatever direction the influences in life (work, media, society, government) push you in? Are you really doing the things you want to do in your life or are you doing 'what's expected of you'? If you've thought about it and you really want to do what's expected of you because that's your preference, then that is great. But, many of us fall into the trap of doing what's expected of us because that's the only option we're presented with and we don't know enough to look for others. 'You WILL go to college / university, you will get a job in business, you will get a mortgage, have 2.5 children, get a promotion, get a larger mortgage and a bigger car, retire at 65' - any of that sound familiar? How many of us have thought that was the only path and never looked for alternatives?

And you know what? There are as many alternatives out there as there are different people out there!

That's very much what this site is about, to explore what the alternatives are, to move beyond what's expected of you, to learn how to take control and get what you want out of life rather than what others (rightly or wrongly) may want for you. How to define what are the things you want to do during your 750,000 hours and then how to go out and get them!

If this is the only time you've got, shouldn't you make the most of it?