In yesterday's post we talked about your Red Book, an approach for defining and planning out how you will achieve your dreams. Like many planning activities, there is often a great deal of enthusiasm around the initial plan, but then time passes and your wonderful plan slips away, only to be thought of with guilt for not doing anything more with it. That's why this approach is not just about creating a plan, but also about how you work the plan until you reach your dreams.
But, by the way, there is power in just going through the planning process and turning your mind to what you want. I went to a financial planning seminar many years ago and one of the night's exercises was to write down ten things we wanted to accomplish financially. I got busy with other things and tossed the list in a drawer, didn't take a look at it until five years later. Guess what? Every single thing on that list had been accomplished!
So we've already got even more omph that simply writing a list and tossing it in a drawer with the first part of the Red Book Process. The next part is to ensure that you rapidly and consistently progress towards your goals. Here's how to 'Work' the Red Book after you've come up with your plan:
1.) Put 12 meetings in your diary for you (and your partner). This is one to two hours per month for thinking, discussing and planning what you have done and what you will do next in moving towards achieving your dreams. Make the meeting in a special place where you can talk and spend a couple hours uninterrupted.
2.) Bring your Red Book and your To-Do List(s). And when I say To-Do List, I am talking about your Work To-Do list. Yes, I want you to put your personal stuff on your work to-do list! Why? Because your work to-do list is the one you focus on, put the most importance on and get the most things done on, why wouldn't you put your the most important activities of your life (achieving your dreams) on there too?
3.) Have a cup of coffee and go through each of the items under each of the categories, discuss and check off the things that you have done, enjoy what you have accomplished so far. Each and every check gets you closer to your goals
4.) Look at each of the items under each of the categories, what needs to be done next? Assess, is it something we can do during the coming month? Break each task down into something that can be done in 15 minutes or less (we can always find 15 minutes, right?!). Decide who will do it and put it on that person's To-Do List.
5.) Make sure the next meeting is in both of your diaries!
This monthly meeting is the key to making progress, along with putting your 'Dream Delivery' activities on your work to-do list and breaking the tasks down into 15 minute chunks. Steve always says that we over estimate what we can do in a day and under estimate what we can do in a year, and we've found that to be very true. Each month you'll see the progress that you've made (even if it is just one little thing!) which will motivate you to do more - you're making progress, that's exciting!
Showing posts with label Red Book. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Red Book. Show all posts
Friday, April 10, 2009
Thursday, April 9, 2009
Oh, But You're Different, You Have...
...so much time, so much money, so much more energy - rubbish! When we started, we didn't have anything more than anyone else and to tell the truth, we actually started in a worse off position than most. We didn't have more money, certainly didn't have more time, we're not significantly more energetic than most, and there are a whole lot of people out there who are smarter than we are. But there is one thing that we have and use that most people don't, The Red Book.
The Red Book for us is actually a red book, but it is also our approach to life planning and dream achievement - a way to define, work towards and achieve what you've been dreaming about, in a way that is eminently doable. We've found it to be a great tool for rapidly achieving our goals and also for strengthing our relationship. Much of it is commonsense and uses things that you hear about, but the approach for 'working' the Red Book is different and effective. In six years it has enabled us to acquire three houses, launch a successful consulting business, get an MBA from Duke, visit 20 countries, motorbike 20,000 miles around Europe, find and fix up our sailboat, 'retire' at 46 and 48 with a self-sustaining income, and spend our time sailing around the Bahamas. It is simple to put together and easy to use, sound interesting?
Today's post is Part I, Creating the Red Book. 'Working' the Red Book will follow. Okay, here's how it works:
1.) Get yourself a book (it can be red or not, but make it a nice one), this is the place where you're going to put all your dreams and your plans for achieving them. It's a very important book
2.) Set aside some uninterrupted thinking time, and I am talking somewhere in the neighborhood of 1-3 days. We typically do this around New Year's Day or during our holiday / vacation. Long weekends are good for this too.
3.) If you have a partner, you both must do this together (and if you've ever tried to reach a goal when your partner isn't involved, doesn't understand or isn't bought into it and achieved a stunning lack of progress, you'll understand why!). If you're a singleton, this piece of work will be shorter and involve less negotiation.
4.) With your partner, define the six to eight most important 'Categories of Your Life'. Some examples are Relationship, Children, Family, Health, Finances, Travel, Personal Growth, etc. These categories must be agreed upon by the two of you. Don't just rush to the sample categories I've listed, really think and talk about what is important to you - and they can be things that are not currently present in your life, new is okay.
5.) Once you have defined / agreed upon your categories, it is time to think about the contents of those categories. For each one, ask this question, 'If this could be great, what would it be like?' If our relationship was great, what would it be like? If our finances were great, what would they be like? Make a list of all those things for each category.
6.) There are some rules which come into play at this point, everyone's dreams are okay, a person's dreams are their dreams - no one's is better than another. This is not the place for judgement or criticism.
7.) Think about / discuss the interesting things that are emerging during the questioning and list making. Although the fear when embarking on this may be that the list will be too long and you won't be able to do it all, typically that does not happen in Year 1. Bigger and more dreams tend to emerge as you get used to using the Red Book and gain confidence in your ability to achieve your dreams with this approach.
8.) When the lists of 'how it could be great' are complete for each category, it is time to refine them and select / agree which things you will do for this year. We do discuss and look at things over a longer horizon, and plan for them, but keeping the activities to this year makes it immediate and somehow doable. If something is three years out, you don't really have to do anything about it, do you?
9.) This is NOT the time to be a martyr and say, 'Oh, fine, if that's what you want (big sigh). It is not time to criticize the dreams, it is time to build upon them. The rule here is you cannot say, 'I don't like that' to any of the ideas, you MUST come up with a better one if you are not comfortable with the idea as it stands (and I think this may be a core difference in this approach to dream development and planning). If a dream / goal doesn't work for you, you must come up with a better one. this is hard to do and this is where it takes a lot of time because we are so used to creating win/lose situations and have very little practice creating win/win situations - but for you both to get excited and want to do this, it must be a win/win.
10.) Once you've agreed your lists, take a break, do something else for a while and let the list percolate for a bit. Do any new thoughts or ideas emerge? Is there any goal that still needs to be worked on to make it right for both of you?
11.) For each item in each category, write down the high level things that you must do to make it happen.
12.) What are the things on that list that you can do now or in the next few days? Launch your plan, make it start, make it real and do them!
The next step is to 'Work' the Red Book over the course of the coming year and continuously complete the activities which move you closer to your dreams, we'll talk about that in an upcoming post.
The Red Book for us is actually a red book, but it is also our approach to life planning and dream achievement - a way to define, work towards and achieve what you've been dreaming about, in a way that is eminently doable. We've found it to be a great tool for rapidly achieving our goals and also for strengthing our relationship. Much of it is commonsense and uses things that you hear about, but the approach for 'working' the Red Book is different and effective. In six years it has enabled us to acquire three houses, launch a successful consulting business, get an MBA from Duke, visit 20 countries, motorbike 20,000 miles around Europe, find and fix up our sailboat, 'retire' at 46 and 48 with a self-sustaining income, and spend our time sailing around the Bahamas. It is simple to put together and easy to use, sound interesting?
Today's post is Part I, Creating the Red Book. 'Working' the Red Book will follow. Okay, here's how it works:
1.) Get yourself a book (it can be red or not, but make it a nice one), this is the place where you're going to put all your dreams and your plans for achieving them. It's a very important book
2.) Set aside some uninterrupted thinking time, and I am talking somewhere in the neighborhood of 1-3 days. We typically do this around New Year's Day or during our holiday / vacation. Long weekends are good for this too.
3.) If you have a partner, you both must do this together (and if you've ever tried to reach a goal when your partner isn't involved, doesn't understand or isn't bought into it and achieved a stunning lack of progress, you'll understand why!). If you're a singleton, this piece of work will be shorter and involve less negotiation.
4.) With your partner, define the six to eight most important 'Categories of Your Life'. Some examples are Relationship, Children, Family, Health, Finances, Travel, Personal Growth, etc. These categories must be agreed upon by the two of you. Don't just rush to the sample categories I've listed, really think and talk about what is important to you - and they can be things that are not currently present in your life, new is okay.
5.) Once you have defined / agreed upon your categories, it is time to think about the contents of those categories. For each one, ask this question, 'If this could be great, what would it be like?' If our relationship was great, what would it be like? If our finances were great, what would they be like? Make a list of all those things for each category.
6.) There are some rules which come into play at this point, everyone's dreams are okay, a person's dreams are their dreams - no one's is better than another. This is not the place for judgement or criticism.
7.) Think about / discuss the interesting things that are emerging during the questioning and list making. Although the fear when embarking on this may be that the list will be too long and you won't be able to do it all, typically that does not happen in Year 1. Bigger and more dreams tend to emerge as you get used to using the Red Book and gain confidence in your ability to achieve your dreams with this approach.
8.) When the lists of 'how it could be great' are complete for each category, it is time to refine them and select / agree which things you will do for this year. We do discuss and look at things over a longer horizon, and plan for them, but keeping the activities to this year makes it immediate and somehow doable. If something is three years out, you don't really have to do anything about it, do you?
9.) This is NOT the time to be a martyr and say, 'Oh, fine, if that's what you want (big sigh). It is not time to criticize the dreams, it is time to build upon them. The rule here is you cannot say, 'I don't like that' to any of the ideas, you MUST come up with a better one if you are not comfortable with the idea as it stands (and I think this may be a core difference in this approach to dream development and planning). If a dream / goal doesn't work for you, you must come up with a better one. this is hard to do and this is where it takes a lot of time because we are so used to creating win/lose situations and have very little practice creating win/win situations - but for you both to get excited and want to do this, it must be a win/win.
10.) Once you've agreed your lists, take a break, do something else for a while and let the list percolate for a bit. Do any new thoughts or ideas emerge? Is there any goal that still needs to be worked on to make it right for both of you?
11.) For each item in each category, write down the high level things that you must do to make it happen.
12.) What are the things on that list that you can do now or in the next few days? Launch your plan, make it start, make it real and do them!
The next step is to 'Work' the Red Book over the course of the coming year and continuously complete the activities which move you closer to your dreams, we'll talk about that in an upcoming post.
Sunday, January 11, 2009
Red Book Next Steps - Turning Wishes and Dreams into Reality
We spent New Year's Day working on this year's Red Book, our wishes, dreams, vision for 2009. Then we set it aside for a couple weeks to let it 'furgle' (furgling is a Steve term for letting something simmer). Since it's set a bit and we're still happy (and excited) about what we've drafted, now it's time to get started turning our dreams into reality. Today we're sitting down with the Red Book and beginning to plan. For us this means taking each item we want to accomplish (the wishes and dreams) and breaking them down into what does Steve need to do and what do I need to do to make that item happen.
Here's an example. One of our aspriations for this year -is to get into the best physical shape of our lives (incredibly brave of me to put that into print, isn't it?!). We're mid 40's and now is the time to do it. This is a big and exciting goal, but left by itself it won't turn into reality. Very simplistically, it needs to be surrounded by lots of little goals that added together deliver the big and exciting goal. Each little goal baby steps you closer and closer to the big one. You also get a sense of achievement with every little goal you accomplish, knowing that you're one step closer and you're making progress on the big one.
So how do we get to 'best physical shape of our lives'? Some of it we've already started on our sailing trip. Steve has lost 30-40 pounds, I've lost an undisclosed amount. We're both more active and flexible than we've been in years. The foundation is in place with last year's goals. Now we have to do something that will take us to the next level. In our plan we want to spend a bit of time in England and Europe next year, we want to start the hunt for a place in Italy and we've been talking about doing a bicycle trip for a few years now so we're going to combine those with the goal of getting into great physical shape into a bike trip around Italy - on a tandem!
So how do we turn that into reality? Well, we need to be in England (buy tickets - K), we need to have a route (plan the route - S), we need train tickets to get the bike to Italy (research trains and buy tickets - K), we need to get in shape so we can spend all that time on a bike (work up to 25 miles per day on bikes - S&K), need a tandem (research and narrow selection - K, try and make final selection - S&K), book first night hotel and find list of potential B&Bs to stay at along the way (research, make reservation - S). Those are just a few of the steps which get us to achieving that goal.
For each goal we do this, then we each add our tasks to our individual to-do lists and then begin working on them. This may seem like common sense or what you read in all the books, but there are some things that make this approach different for us. We do it together at a time of year when it is exciting to set goals, we break what we want to do into small steps that fit onto the daily to-do lists, they're little so they get done. We get together to review the list and our progress every month or so which refocuses us on what we want to do (versus what those who may not have our interests at heart want us to do), and we check off what we've accomplished along the way which gives us the opportunity for a boost, "We're really making good progress on this one, aren't we?" or to infuse a bit more effort, "Whoops, haven't made much progress on that one, we need to..." And it is fun to get together once a month and go over our lists and see how much closer we are to doing the things we want to do! It keeps us working together on where we want to get to rather than drifting off in different directions. And the final thing that makes it different is most of the things we want to accomplish are really fun and exciting (we try to stay away from ho-hum goals), we focus on things that make us say, "Yes! It would be so cool if we could do that!!!"
That's how we take something huge and make into something we get done, year on year - great big wishes to reality and how we have fun with it along the way.
Here's an example. One of our aspriations for this year -is to get into the best physical shape of our lives (incredibly brave of me to put that into print, isn't it?!). We're mid 40's and now is the time to do it. This is a big and exciting goal, but left by itself it won't turn into reality. Very simplistically, it needs to be surrounded by lots of little goals that added together deliver the big and exciting goal. Each little goal baby steps you closer and closer to the big one. You also get a sense of achievement with every little goal you accomplish, knowing that you're one step closer and you're making progress on the big one.
So how do we get to 'best physical shape of our lives'? Some of it we've already started on our sailing trip. Steve has lost 30-40 pounds, I've lost an undisclosed amount. We're both more active and flexible than we've been in years. The foundation is in place with last year's goals. Now we have to do something that will take us to the next level. In our plan we want to spend a bit of time in England and Europe next year, we want to start the hunt for a place in Italy and we've been talking about doing a bicycle trip for a few years now so we're going to combine those with the goal of getting into great physical shape into a bike trip around Italy - on a tandem!
So how do we turn that into reality? Well, we need to be in England (buy tickets - K), we need to have a route (plan the route - S), we need train tickets to get the bike to Italy (research trains and buy tickets - K), we need to get in shape so we can spend all that time on a bike (work up to 25 miles per day on bikes - S&K), need a tandem (research and narrow selection - K, try and make final selection - S&K), book first night hotel and find list of potential B&Bs to stay at along the way (research, make reservation - S). Those are just a few of the steps which get us to achieving that goal.
For each goal we do this, then we each add our tasks to our individual to-do lists and then begin working on them. This may seem like common sense or what you read in all the books, but there are some things that make this approach different for us. We do it together at a time of year when it is exciting to set goals, we break what we want to do into small steps that fit onto the daily to-do lists, they're little so they get done. We get together to review the list and our progress every month or so which refocuses us on what we want to do (versus what those who may not have our interests at heart want us to do), and we check off what we've accomplished along the way which gives us the opportunity for a boost, "We're really making good progress on this one, aren't we?" or to infuse a bit more effort, "Whoops, haven't made much progress on that one, we need to..." And it is fun to get together once a month and go over our lists and see how much closer we are to doing the things we want to do! It keeps us working together on where we want to get to rather than drifting off in different directions. And the final thing that makes it different is most of the things we want to accomplish are really fun and exciting (we try to stay away from ho-hum goals), we focus on things that make us say, "Yes! It would be so cool if we could do that!!!"
That's how we take something huge and make into something we get done, year on year - great big wishes to reality and how we have fun with it along the way.
Saturday, December 6, 2008
The Red Book
As we get closer to the end of the year, we start to think about our annual planning session and making this year's entries in the 'Red Book'. This approach to personal planning is what we think is one of the key differentiators which enabled us to make the progress we've made in the past six years.
I've been doing some thinking to decide what made the difference, enabling us to go from what essentially was a significant negative position when we met to giving up serious work six years later? Some would argue that we were both at a senior level, in a peak lifetime earning period. There is also an argument that there were also a couple of nice bonuses during that period which made a difference. We made some money selling a house which we put into another.
Actually we both made decent money before meeting each other, but the relationship dynamics were different. Two peak wage earners together, I'm sure has made a difference. The bonuses I would discount as differentiators because they are not significantly different than normal bonuses for individuals doing what we do, and in fact, could be considered less as only one of us earned a bonus at a time rather than both. And given the time period, selling a house for more than what you paid for it was the norm. Even cumulatively, there are plenty of other folks who encountered all of the above events in the same period of time. So I don't really think those were differentiators or things that enabled a significant financial leap forward.
There were two things that I think made a difference - number 1, we didn't go out and have a burster buying cars, as a matter of fact we didn't buy any cars except the one in Florida which we paid cash for rather than financing. It would have been quite easy to 'treat' ourselves to a little sports car and all the attendant costs. I think the actual cost of a new car and it's impact on the ability to grow wealth is far more significant than commonly realised.
The second thing that has made a difference, and that which has made the biggest difference is our annual plan. Each year the two of us sit down together and identify what are the most important things or 'categories' in our lives. For each of those, we ask, 'At this time next year, if this could be great, what would it look like?' For example, one of the categories is our relationship, so we ask, 'At this time next year, if our relationship could be great, what would it be like?' That sets the goal or target for that category. We then set similar targets for our other categories - our children, our families, travel, personal development, business, financial, and health.
What's particularly interesting about this is the negotiation process for identifying what we would like to do and setting the targets. Often we want different things or one of us suggests something that the other is not enthusiastic about. This could easily move from being a fun and exciting activity to a battle without a couple of important rules - the 'I'm not really bothered' and the 'You have to come up with a better one' rules. If you're not really bothered about what the other person wants to do, go with it, try it - it could be fun (no martyr or 'if you get, then I get' behaviour either), but you do have to be sincerely not bothered about doing that thing. 'You have to come up with a better one' is the rule which states if you don't like the idea the other person has come up with, you have to come up with a better idea or reshape their idea so it is better. No 'I don't like that idea' or 'No, that doesn't work for me', you have to do the work to take the idea to the next level. Then if the other person doesn't like it, he has to do the same - make it better. This takes time and can be hard work, but ideas then shape and evolve into something much better. And rather than ending up with one person being excited over something and the other dragging their feet, you end up something great which the two of you can get really excited over!
With the targets for each category set, we then break down step by step how we are going to get to those targets. What calls need to be made, what research has to be done, what reservations need to be made, etc. That gives us both the targets and the plan for achieving those targets which is great, but a plan all by itself is just a piece of paper with writing on it. The key is to structure things so you deliver the plan. At the end of the planning session, we review all the activities and add those we can do soon to our to-do lists. That gets us off to a good start. We then work those to-do's.
That's a good start and some great momentum, but the key is keeping that momentum going throughout the year, not just during the planning session. For that we have Sunday morning Starbucks meetings where we take the plan and our to-do lists to Starbucks (or a park or just someplace out of the house that we like to go to). We have a coffee and review what to-do's are done and what to-do's from the plan need to be added to the list. We do this as needed, every week, two weeks or at a minimum every month.
Important thing on the to-do lists, these personal to-do lists have to be merged with the work to-do lists - otherwise work to-do's will always take priority and personal to-do's will be left till last (in other words, not done!).
I've been doing some thinking to decide what made the difference, enabling us to go from what essentially was a significant negative position when we met to giving up serious work six years later? Some would argue that we were both at a senior level, in a peak lifetime earning period. There is also an argument that there were also a couple of nice bonuses during that period which made a difference. We made some money selling a house which we put into another.
Actually we both made decent money before meeting each other, but the relationship dynamics were different. Two peak wage earners together, I'm sure has made a difference. The bonuses I would discount as differentiators because they are not significantly different than normal bonuses for individuals doing what we do, and in fact, could be considered less as only one of us earned a bonus at a time rather than both. And given the time period, selling a house for more than what you paid for it was the norm. Even cumulatively, there are plenty of other folks who encountered all of the above events in the same period of time. So I don't really think those were differentiators or things that enabled a significant financial leap forward.
There were two things that I think made a difference - number 1, we didn't go out and have a burster buying cars, as a matter of fact we didn't buy any cars except the one in Florida which we paid cash for rather than financing. It would have been quite easy to 'treat' ourselves to a little sports car and all the attendant costs. I think the actual cost of a new car and it's impact on the ability to grow wealth is far more significant than commonly realised.
The second thing that has made a difference, and that which has made the biggest difference is our annual plan. Each year the two of us sit down together and identify what are the most important things or 'categories' in our lives. For each of those, we ask, 'At this time next year, if this could be great, what would it look like?' For example, one of the categories is our relationship, so we ask, 'At this time next year, if our relationship could be great, what would it be like?' That sets the goal or target for that category. We then set similar targets for our other categories - our children, our families, travel, personal development, business, financial, and health.
What's particularly interesting about this is the negotiation process for identifying what we would like to do and setting the targets. Often we want different things or one of us suggests something that the other is not enthusiastic about. This could easily move from being a fun and exciting activity to a battle without a couple of important rules - the 'I'm not really bothered' and the 'You have to come up with a better one' rules. If you're not really bothered about what the other person wants to do, go with it, try it - it could be fun (no martyr or 'if you get, then I get' behaviour either), but you do have to be sincerely not bothered about doing that thing. 'You have to come up with a better one' is the rule which states if you don't like the idea the other person has come up with, you have to come up with a better idea or reshape their idea so it is better. No 'I don't like that idea' or 'No, that doesn't work for me', you have to do the work to take the idea to the next level. Then if the other person doesn't like it, he has to do the same - make it better. This takes time and can be hard work, but ideas then shape and evolve into something much better. And rather than ending up with one person being excited over something and the other dragging their feet, you end up something great which the two of you can get really excited over!
With the targets for each category set, we then break down step by step how we are going to get to those targets. What calls need to be made, what research has to be done, what reservations need to be made, etc. That gives us both the targets and the plan for achieving those targets which is great, but a plan all by itself is just a piece of paper with writing on it. The key is to structure things so you deliver the plan. At the end of the planning session, we review all the activities and add those we can do soon to our to-do lists. That gets us off to a good start. We then work those to-do's.
That's a good start and some great momentum, but the key is keeping that momentum going throughout the year, not just during the planning session. For that we have Sunday morning Starbucks meetings where we take the plan and our to-do lists to Starbucks (or a park or just someplace out of the house that we like to go to). We have a coffee and review what to-do's are done and what to-do's from the plan need to be added to the list. We do this as needed, every week, two weeks or at a minimum every month.
Important thing on the to-do lists, these personal to-do lists have to be merged with the work to-do lists - otherwise work to-do's will always take priority and personal to-do's will be left till last (in other words, not done!).
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